Stars are Blind
by phoenix-shalimar
Summary: Sometimes those sweet words are just vicious stings, those gifts merely buisness propositions, those looks are just your imagination. That feeling in your heart when he looks at you, holds you, kisses you, well love isn't always happy ever after. WAVE K/M


_This is my second story for the Kai/Mimi WAVE and well I have to say it isnt anything like my first one and hopefully you've read that one before this one as it kinda corroborates with the other one. But in saying that you probably dont really have to read that one to understand this one. But go read that one all the same :D_

_Disclaimer: _I do not own beyblade or any of its affiliates so there.

Dedication: This is dedicated to...

Kai: I guess we have to dedicate it to that whore

Nix: (glares) Yes _**I **_am going to dedicate it to her because without her we wouldn't have this pairing.

Kai: (raises eyebrow)

Nix: Ok so maybe we might have but who would have converted so many Kai/Mimi lovers?

Kai: (gives a knowing look)

Nix: What?

Kai: (shakes head)

Nix: Fine watever, doesn't bother me none, Lolly will just sort you out later. (smirks)

Kai: (pales) God no, dont let her take me, not again I don't think I could handle the box. Again.

Nix: Well that must have been your fault for pissing her off then,

Kai: (pleads) Dont let her take me Nix, your a good person dont let her do it.

Nix: (slaps Kai) Get a grip man, no one wants to hear your pathetic pleas so shut up and let them get on with the fic. Dedicated to **Lamanth**. (grins)

* * *

The memory of our first kiss together still haunts me late at night, the feel of your arms wrapped securely around me are still imprinted on my body. Sometimes I wake late at night convinced that you've just walked in the door, but I know its not true. You don't know where I live anymore. I moved.

I still sit and stare at photos of us, taking in your image even though its already imprinted on my mind for all time. Everytime I close my eyes I see your scarlet eyes staring back at me, one slightly paler then the other.

My heart breaks with every beat, I die every night with every dream, it hurts with every breath I take. I hate you for doing this to me, for making me have to go through this kind of pain, for letting me know that love isn't forever like in the movies.

It's been 10 years since you left me standing on that bridge. 10 fucking years of agony. Of not knowing why. It's the only thing I think that has kept me from moving on from you, not knowing why you did it.

So why? Did you just get bored of me? Was I not enough for you?

I've done everything I can to distance myself from you, I moved 50,000 miles away from you and still that doesn't seem to be enough. Still it's like your with me, still taunting me, mocking me. All I ask is for a simple reason why.

Don't I atleast deserve that?

Did every moment we spent together mean nothing to you?

_Kai smiled over at the glow that shined from her every pore. Knowing that this was something she had always longed to do made him endure the four hours he would have to spend watching the ballet._

_His eyes couldn't stop themselves as time after time they roamed over the petite girl beside him, in her long flowing white gown, hair hung in loose ringlets, she looked like a grecian goddess come to grace him with her beauty._

_The ballet couldn't end soon enough for him. Kai walked tall, straight and pompous as he lead her, one small hand tucked in the crook of his elbow, down the many stairs. Her other hand slid loosly down the railing to keep her balance in her high heals. _

_Kai nodded to each of the old greying business men he passed,each standing next to their wife, might aswell be courteous, after all he would need their investments to keep the company going._

_As they reached the lobby draped in red velvet Kai nearly breathed a sigh of relief, he could see the door and knew they would soon be out into the fresh night air. He could feel her giddy excitement, it vibrated up his arm and down his body. He turned and smiled down at her, she giggled as she looked up at him, her eyes shining with her happyness._

_A throat being cleared loudly broke Kai's gaze from hers. He turned only to meet the gaze of his grandfather, the anger Kai felt at being interupted was clearly displayed on his face. _

_Kai raised an eyebrow as the ice cold, ever efficient mask slid effortlessly back into place._

_They exchanged very polite words before Kai hurridly made their exit and practically ran her out the door, he would've thrown her over his shoulder and run but that would've been too indecent._

_They got outside and Kai kept their hurried pace up until the were atleast two blocks away from the opera house.Once he deemed they were far enough away -even though he'd never get far enough away from Him, Kai slowed their pace and looked down at the small girl beside him, her breath had sped up her cheeks slightly flushed giving them a pink glow that made her shine -if possible even more. _

_Ming-Ming looked up at him and giggled breathlessly, Kai grinned back at her before he too laughed. He wasn't quite sure what they were laughing about but it didn't seem to matter. Raising a hand he gently cupped the side of her face, lowering his head he pressed his mouth to hers. _

_Lips strained hungry for more in a wide open mouthed kiss that was more like they were trying to devour each other. He let his hands roam over the expensive silk dress she wore, gliding over her glorious curves and across her flat stomach down to her hips which he used to pull her closer to him until they were as close as they could get being dressed._

Ming Ming closed her eyes with a heavy sigh as she rubbed at her temples with her fingers, she had a headache, and she was tired, but she was determined to do this. She _had_ to. She knew that if she didn't finish this tonight, that it would sit on her desk for days, weeks. She needed to get closure, she hoped this was the way to get it.

Swinging around in her chair she faced the window that was situated behind her. The small backyard was dark, the moon obscured by heavy pregnant clouds granted her no comfort this night. She couldn't see anything, yet she knew exactly what was in the backyard. Grass, that most likely needed mowing again, a swing set sitting in the middle, the close line towards the left side of the house, a ball, lying beside a dark green picnic table.

Turning her chair back around to face the desk she picked up her pen and continued writing, her laptop sat to the left of her. Turned off. She couldn't bear to make this letter impersonal, it was too personal, she needed to write it by hand, leave him with one last thing of her. She just hoped he would read it.

Through the past 10 years that have gone by I have done a lot of thinking, a lot of growing up. Certain situations made me need to grow up. But it still never stopped the hurt inside, the hurt you caused. I still wonder if your the same sweet, loving man I was willing to pledge myself to. Or if you've returned to that cold, arrogant man I always despied.

I wish I could know why you did it, how we grew apart without even knowing about it. Or if there was some underlying reason, something out of your control. I just wish you would have talked to me, I knew something was wrong in the last week we were together, you were distant, no longer playful or caring. Almost as if you were putting a wall between us in preperation.

I guess I should stop being hung up on you, I dont know how many times i've told myself that. How many times i've looked into that bathroom mirror and said I wont think of you. But you see its not all about me, how can I explain to her what went wrong when I dont even know myself. How can I tell her why your not around?

She's starting to ask questions, questions I dont have the answers for. If you can't do it for me, then atleast do it for her Kai. Do it for your daughter. Help her to know why.

Ming Ming blinked back tears as she folded up the letter and placed it into an envelope, promising that this would be the last time she would let him rule her life. A promise she knew she wouldn't keep. As she scrawled the address on the front the door to her study opened.

A small crimson eyed 10 year old girl padded into the room, rubbing her eyes at the bright light. "Maman?" she questioned softly, Ming Ming looked up her eyes instantly softening as she looked upon the small form of her daughter. "What is it sweeting?" she queried as she wiped away her tears and moved to kneel infront of her daughter.

"I had a dream that daddy came home, but I couldn't find him when I woke up." Tears instantly sprang to Ming Ming's eyes, she crushed her daughter to her in a tight hug, "Oh sweeting."

xxx

Rei frowned as he looked at the name scrawled atop the envelope, _who would be writing to Kai?_ Setting his bag and keys down he made his way slowly over to the couch and sat down, the letter still in hand. He wondered wheather to open it or not, it was a great temptation one he knew he probably should avoid.

Making up his mind he set the letter down on the couch and went about tidying up the house, Mariah and their newborn son would be home from the hospital soon and he wanted the house to be immaculate for their arrival. But still the letter beckoned him, called to him. He took a look around the messy house and then looked back at the letter.

Before he could change his mind Rei moved over to the couch and picked up the letter, there was no return address on the back which he though odd. He peeled off the tab that kept the envelope closed and carefully pulled out the letter.

Sorrow had punched a hole in his heart and guilt had wormed its way into his stomach to writhe about in masses. _The poor girl, she doesn't know._

He wished he knew who she was, he wanted desperately to let her know the truth but she never once mentioned her name knowing that Kai would know who she was. Leaving the house he ran down the street letter in hand while all the while his heart ached for the girl who had written the letter.

He stopped outside the double doors trying to catch his breath, he entered into the air conditioned foyer, as always there were plenty of people mulling around. He walked straight over to the stairs knowing exactly were he was going, taking them two at a time he went up three floors. Pushing the door to the staircase open he entered into the brightly lit hallway, his feet echoeing loudly in the silence.

He counted the doors he passed until he came to door number 18 on the third floor. Stopping outside of it he took a deep breath before he opened the door. As always the room hadn't changed at all, he moved into the room and placed the letter down on the table. "This came for you today Kai, I dont know who its from she didn't leave her name but I know that she loved you. Im sorry for invading your privacy and reading it but I just had to. You have a daughter Kai, can you believe it? I wish you could tell me who she is, so I could send a reply back. But you wont, you can't. I guess I just wanted you to know."

With that said he turned around and left the room in the same condition it was in, bereft of any life. He walked down the hallway lost in thought. _I wish I knew who you were so I could tell you, so I could let you know that Kai is no longer Kai, and as always his grandfather still tortures him, keeps him on those machines. Kai's dead, he was in a major car crash 9 years ago and hasn't come out of a coma since, the doctors said he was brain dead, the only thing keeping him alive is those machines._

_That is not living, Kai doesn't know anything, he can't hear anyone when they speak to him, he has no conciousness to speak of. But his Grandfather refuses to let them take him off the machines, using up valuble resources that could be used for someone who really needs it. And putting off letting us all let him go._

_Its cruel to leave him like that. I only wish that I could end your suffering and let you know that he's gone and he is never coming back. Not to you, not to anyone._

_

* * *

_

_Ok well there we go, theres my second one, my god do you know how hard it was for me to make it a non-happy ending? Bloody difficult I tell you. At first Kai was sposed to be dead and buried and his Grandfather read the letter but then I decided to have Rei read it and it originally went that Rei ran to the cemetary and not the hospital but then Rei had other ideas and it turned out this way, and then I had to have a way of explaining what happened and Rei started to write a letter before I realised that he doesn't know who she is so I had to quickly change that._

_And bloody hell this was tough to do cos everyone kept trying to take over and do it their way, at first it was going to be a happy ending but I was adamant that it wouldn't go that way and I think I prevailed._

_So I hope you like it._

_Phoenix_


End file.
